I loves me a bit of glitter, I’m a sucker for the sparkle – I used to feel like anything would be better with a bit of glitter on it – food, makeup, decor, even some cunt I’d normally want to punch in the face……
I did a lot of glittery things throughout last year, like my green glittery anus top;
From September to mid December, I was pretty much constantly working with glitter or surrounded by it, which resulted in a total glitter overdose that pushed me to my limit and ended with what can only be described as me having a bad case of ‘glitteritious’.
Nearly everything I own became infected with glitter – I was always covered, which lead to me spreading bits of glitter wherever I went & everything I touched – got glittered. I was passing it on to other people – like it was some dirty germy virus; You could say I was Kuntagious & Kuntaminating everything & everyone else!
At first, I have to admit – I really quite enjoyed it. I felt all magical, like I had been showered in unicorn pee, or that I was a mystical fairy from a fantastical 80’s movie and I was just spreading a little bit of my magic everywhere I went; but that was when I was only being adorned with ultra fine, translucent & iridescent glitters, that would only glisten (rather beautifully) and become apparent as they caught the light (which happened to be most of the time…).
But that feeling of joy came to a big fat fucking stinking end when the darker & chunkier grade glitters started appearing.
Chunks of the not-so-magical-looking shades, like black, gunmetal, navy, purple, green……
– and that’s really not a pretty look, especially when it seems to be concentrated on your scalp, or its scattered on your chest looking like a bad case of stubble.
Now you may think I’m exaggerating – but below is a photo from when the glitter-disease reached it’s peak. I hadn’t been doing anything crafty that day, I’d washed my hair the day before & just tied it up – I hadn’t done anything involving glitter over that space of time……
But when I brushed my hair – this is what fell out:
An avalanche of glitter dandruff! – So I jumped in the bath & washed my hair – and this what was left behind…..
That photo makes me look like I’m some filthy dirty skank that never bathes – But no, that’s ALL motherfucking multicoloured glitter; this became a far too regular occurrence.
My scalp would not de-glitter, regardless of what I tried. If anything, it seemed like my head had become a glitter magnet; So much so, that it got to the point that I even started to believe that my scalp had miraculously transformed into a glitter factory and I was now producing my own, since I kept seeing colours I hadn’t recently used – or been anywhere near.
– And the biggest mystery that totally perplexed me: Every time I washed my hair, I ended up with a thumb sized patch of gold glitter just on the edge of forehead & hair line, in the same place – every freaking time.
The glitter did eventually start to disappear – which coincided with me being on a course of antibiotics, so it may be a coincidence or I really did have some glitter-virus.